UK Yankee Monday Giving Day
Monday has rolled around again and I hope that you all had nice weekends and maybe found the opportunity to try out Minnie Sue’s Christmas Cocoa from our Saturday blog-post! Today is UK Yankee Monday Giving Day which seems like a pretty good fit to the Advent theme. You won’t be hearing from me though. Instead, I have invited Heather Stark from Grace & Grit Box to talk about giving.
My life has been filled with serendipity over the last 12 months and ‘meeting’ Heather definitely falls into that category! I spotted her Grace & Grit Boxes on Facebook because she name-checked Anni Betts (the fabulous illustrator of our very own inclusive baby book: The Baby Files: A Book Celebrating My First Year). Anni illustrated some of the elements in Heather’s Grace & Grit box. Of course I had to check these Boxes out and to say that I was blown away is an understatement. Heather has created the most empowering, thoughtful, kick-ass product for girls that I have seen in a long time! (But more on that tomorrow 🙂 ).
Heather is here today talking about the Gifts that she would like to give her daughter in the form of a Mom Legacy. It honestly moved me to tears when I read it the first time. So here’s Heather. Get a hanky ready…
Welcome Heather from Grace & Grit box (and Gracefully strong)
This summer my daughter and I took a quick mother daughter trip to spend some one on one time with each other. It had been a very long time since it was just the two of us and even though she slept two hours of our three-hour drive, the first hour was really a good hour.
We discovered we both liked to Kill a Mockingbird, she had read it “just because I figured I would have to in school, so why not”. We also have the same sense of sarcasm, which I knew I had passed on to her, and always felt a bit guilty about- until she said something that was rather funny and then I could see the benefit.
This year she started high school. She is in the process of ending childhood and preparing to become a young adult. The end of her “at home years” is fully within sight (insert tears and silent sobbing). Geez, I hope I got some things right.
I asked her what some of her memories of childhood were and she had some good ones, she also had some not so good ones that were hard to hear, however, dealing with them now, and putting some closure on it is better getting called to her therapist’s office one day, right? Also, it is impossible for a mom to be at the top of her game every day. Amen? I need some grace here.
Truth and Grace Time- Ladies, we strike out a lot as moms, and that is okay. In the end, I am hoping it is about the homeruns and not the strikes. We each have the gift of a Mom Legacy. My Mom Legacy consists of 4 gifts I want my daughter to receive.
The gifts of: loving God, loving self, showing grace, being brave. I think if I give nothing else but these four gifts to my girl, I have left a strong legacy.
The first one is just what it is. Simple and pure. Love God. He is why we exist and everything we have is because of His mercy. The second one- love self- it is just as simple as loving God, but harder. We tend to define ourselves by what we aren’t instead of what we are. Helping my daughter appreciate her strengths and giving her the tools to build her weaknesses will lead to a life well lived. The truth is- when you do not love yourself, loving life is impossible.
Have Grace– first have grace for yourself and then gift it to others. Grace is the understanding that failure is a beautiful ugly part of life and we must love ourselves through the ugly to understand the beautiful. Grace is the understanding that not everything in this world is black and white. Grace is the grey. Grace makes the weaknesses easier to work through. Our girls won’t be at the top of their game all the time, it is impossible. We make mistakes- but those mistakes do not define us.
That leaves being brave– doing all the things that are scary. I don’t ever want to hear that my daughter has gone bungee jumping. Dear God, please let her love herself enough to never jump off a bridge with rope tied around her ankles. Amen. But I do want to hear about the times stood up for herself, stood up for the underdog, changed policies that were unfair, voiced an unpopular opinion because she knew it was the right thing to do, and didn’t jump off a bridge just because the others did.
The mom and daughter relationship is so delicate. It can be fierce and tight and then the next minute it can be lazy and loose. However, in the end, if we can give our girls all the gifts that come with loving God, loving ourselves, having grace, and being brave, we are doing pretty good…. heck- dare to throw in a little sarcasm for good measure. Makes those road trips a lot more fun.
There’s nothing to add to that
It’s like Heather reached inside my head and pulled out the wishes that I have for my daughter. I can’t add anything to it- what a foundation to give your child! Heather, thank you so much for being part of the UK Yankee Monday Giving blog! Your words are like the answer to a prayer that I silently sent up when I cast out my net to find contributors to this series. Thank you!
Readers- I’d be really interested to know what you would like your Mom/Dad Legacy to be…let me know below in the comments!
Tomorrow will be Shop Local Tuesday and I have curated a nice little post of really excellent Christmas Gift ideas that will delight recipients and support small businesses alike. Stay tuned!